OUR COMMUNITY GUIDELINES
1. Be supportive - This is a group focused on immediate personal support. All threads should be related to the transgender or gender non-conforming experience, or that of our allies, and also related to immediate personal support. Immediate personal support includes but is not limited to: sharing experiences (both positive and negative), asking for advice, signal boosting community events, and posting selfies. Threads that are not focused on immediate personal support will generally be removed by an admin, with or without warning.
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Immediate personal support does not include:
2. Be nice - This is a support group. Things like being snarky, telling someone to grow a thicker skin, or telling them they are presenting wrong are unacceptable in this space. Being supportive includes things like instilling hope, commiserating and being compassionate, sharing information and strength, validating others' feelings, gently educating other members, and generally being nice. This also means that when members express their feelings of being erased, dismissed, silenced, or invalidated, that we listen to them and *change our behavior*. This also means that if someone says something is racist (or ableist, or transmisogynistic, etc.), we acknowledge it, apologize, and change our behavior. Refusal to listen to other members and admins on this is grounds for removal from the group.
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3. Be inclusive - Our group is huge and international. We have folks from all over the world and all over the gender universe. As such, we ask that our members not refer to the group-at-large with gendered titles. This extends to targeting your posts to certain genders, specifically when asking questions about medical transition. Nonbinary people exist and those who choose to medically transition often follow very similar paths as binary folks. While we don't expect everyone to "know all the lingo", we do ask that folks edit posts when asked and recognize that nonbinary people have input that is just as valuable and accurate as binary folks.
Please don't refer to the entire group with "guys" as in "Hey guys!". While we understand that many folks consider it gender neutral, there are just as many folks who disagree. Regardless, this is many folks' only space where their gender is affirmed, so please use more considerate language like the suggestions below.
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4. Use trigger warnings or content notes - We are a community that has suffered a lot of trauma. As such, we require that threads that include disturbing content be prefaced with a trigger warning (TW) or a content note (CN). Threads that contain the following always require a trigger warning: hate speech and/or transphobia, self-harm, suicide, abuse of any kind, murder, rape and sexual assault, pregnancy, and menstruation. Content notes (CN) are useful when you aren't sure if your content should have a trigger warning, but want to give folks a heads up anyway. Content notes are useful for things like sex, surgery, negative self-talk ("I'm so ugly!", "I'm a horrible person!", "Everyone hates me!"), and other potentially uncomfortable situations.
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5. Admins aren't scary - While we are often only recognized when we're involved in a "hot" thread, we're members just like you. If you're unsure if content is appropriate for the group, feel free to send one of us a message and we'll let you know. We also encourage members to gently educate each other on the guidelines of the group and use the Facebook "Report to Admin" feature if they see something inappropriate. Blocking admins is not allowed and is grounds for removal from the group. Calling us "nazis" is grounds for an immediate removal from the group. You can find a full list of admins here. The link may not work on mobile and may not work for those folks who are not members of the group already. If that is the case, you will have to go to the group, click "info", then "members", then "admins", and it should pull up a full list. Pro tip: That also works for other groups, if you need to find their admins.
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6. No fundraising - While we have, in the past, allowed fundraising for transition-related expenses, we have decided that an across-the-board rule against fundraising is in the group's best interest. Not only is it not really the purpose of the group, transgender and gender non-conforming people are systemically marginalized and are often struggling financially. As such, we encourage folks to share their fundraisers elsewhere. We do, however, allow members to share their personal businesses, so etsy shops or other platforms that offer products are acceptable. We just ask that members share them in the group no more than once a week.
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7. No add-me posts or PM requests - We encourage folks to make friends within the group. Participating on each other's threads will naturally lead to forming friendships. As such, we do not allow folks to make posts that are requests for friend-adds or private messages. There are plenty of other spaces for that kind of thing.
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8. No topless, lingerie, swimsuit or suggestive photos, or images with excessive skin - While we understand that nipples are not inherently sexual, due to the wide variety of bodies and genders in the group and Facebook's lackluster enforcement of their own nudity policy, we do not allow *any* topless images of any kind within the group from anybody of any gender. This means that all shirtless images must be cropped at the armpits. We also do not allow images in lingerie or swimsuits, and images that show excessive skin, cleavage, or are in some way suggestive may be removed at the admins' discretion. This is due to the fact that this group contains minors (as young as 13), many of whom are in situations with less-than-accepting parents, and it would really suck if they lost access to the group because their parents happened to spot someone's scantily clad selfie in the group. There are many trans spaces that do not have these image guidelines, so we feel fair in asking that this space be visually Safe-For-Work.
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9. No prosthetic photos - This relates to the above. Please no images of breastforms, packers, or other groin prosthetics.
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10. No violent images - This includes articles about the latest transgender bashing, images that depict violence, and images of weapons or firearms. While we know that many of our members enjoy hunting or have served in some form of military, we ask that they leave those images depicting firearms or weapons outside the group. Videos depicting verbally abusive or violent behavior directed at others are also unallowed.
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11. No hate speech - Except in the instances of self-identification, any use of slurs or hate speech will be removed. This includes but is not limited to: the t-word, the n-word, f*ggot, b*tch, and sh*male. Repeated use of slurs or hate speech may result in removal from the group. This also extends to the repeated bashing of groups of people. While we understand how frustrating folks can be, extensive bashing of cis folks at large, religious folks at large, etc, may result in removal from the group. This group is about support, and while we all understand the need to vent, we can do that in a way that doesn't bash people and make the space feel unsafe for others.
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12. No call outs - Due to the size of our group, we do not allow call outs in this space. Any screenshots must have individuals' names, phone numbers, and/or other personal identifying information blurred out. We also do not allow call outs of other organizations, groups, or companies. While we're more than willing to help folks navigate a formal reporting process, trying to get the group to rally to petitions etc. is not what this space is for. This includes calling out the admins for removing content that goes against the rules.
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13. No dosages or DIY medical transition - Due to the potential serious health risks, medical transition should be monitored by qualified health care professionals. Therefore, Do-It-Yourself medical transition advice is not allowed in this group. Any comments or threads that list dosage amounts or provide information on how to seek out such information will be deleted. This includes images of prescriptions, bottles, or medication itself that is suggestive of dosages. We encourage all members to be informed of the latest World Professional Association for Transgender Health (WPATH) Standards of Care (SOC) which can be found here.
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14. No sharing outside the group - This is a closed group. Folks can see who is a member, but cannot see any posts or comments unless they are also a member. Sharing anything directly from the group is not advised, as only other group members will see it anyway. Sharing screencaps from the group is not allowed under any circumstances and will result in immediate removal from the group. The only exception to this rule is that some states/provinces/regions/countries require professionals to report suspected abuse or suicide threats. There may be such professionals in the group and any such action by the professional is for the member's protection. It should be noted that we expect professionals to know the legislation relevant to this in their area, to use their best judgement, and to come to the group in the spirit of personal support, rather than professional intervention, whenever possible.
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15. No research, surveys, polls, or fishing for media content - All requests for research of any kind should be forwarded to an admin for review by the rest of the admin team. Since transgender individuals are frequently asked to participate in studies without being provided with knowledge of the researcher's credentials and supervision, a clear description of the study and its procedures, informed consent, information about the risks or benefits of participation, or assurance that data provided will remain confidential and anonymous, any attempt to enlist our members in research without prior admin approval will be deleted without notice. Only studies previously approved by an Institutional Review Board (either university-based or commercial), as required by US federal law when doing human research, (or research similarly governed, if outside the US) will be considered. This extends to surveys, polls, and fishing for media content such as articles or viral lists. Repeated attempts to engage our members in any of the above will result in removal from the group.
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16. No live streaming - Due to the size of the group and Facebook's insufficient administrative tools around live streaming, we do not permit anyone to live stream to the group for reasons of community safety. We encourage those who wish to live stream to do so *outside* the group and then to share the video to the group after live streaming has ceased. Any live streams to the group will be removed on sight.
17. Codeword - The secret code for the group application is 'pineapple' 🍍.
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Immediate personal support does not include:
- The latest news on transgender rights or politics, including hate blogs, petitions, and calls to action.
- "Here, Smell This!"-- sharing transphobic content without an immediate support aspect. (Immediate support aspect example: my father-in-law shared this transphobic facebook post and this is our situation and I need help figuring out how-- or even if, to address it.)
- Other political articles, think pieces, or personal venting/rants about the current political climate.
- The latest celebrity uproar that happens to touch on trans issues.
- Memes or other viral imagery-- we do allow affirmation memes, but try to not have too many at once.
- Sexual, suggestive, or otherwise inappropriate comments on other member's images.
- Threads that exist solely to continue something from a thread that has already been removed or handled by admins.
- Using the group only for self-promotion. If you do nothing else in the group but share your own content (blogs, podcasts, youtube channels, etc), you will be removed.
2. Be nice - This is a support group. Things like being snarky, telling someone to grow a thicker skin, or telling them they are presenting wrong are unacceptable in this space. Being supportive includes things like instilling hope, commiserating and being compassionate, sharing information and strength, validating others' feelings, gently educating other members, and generally being nice. This also means that when members express their feelings of being erased, dismissed, silenced, or invalidated, that we listen to them and *change our behavior*. This also means that if someone says something is racist (or ableist, or transmisogynistic, etc.), we acknowledge it, apologize, and change our behavior. Refusal to listen to other members and admins on this is grounds for removal from the group.
.
.
3. Be inclusive - Our group is huge and international. We have folks from all over the world and all over the gender universe. As such, we ask that our members not refer to the group-at-large with gendered titles. This extends to targeting your posts to certain genders, specifically when asking questions about medical transition. Nonbinary people exist and those who choose to medically transition often follow very similar paths as binary folks. While we don't expect everyone to "know all the lingo", we do ask that folks edit posts when asked and recognize that nonbinary people have input that is just as valuable and accurate as binary folks.
Please don't refer to the entire group with "guys" as in "Hey guys!". While we understand that many folks consider it gender neutral, there are just as many folks who disagree. Regardless, this is many folks' only space where their gender is affirmed, so please use more considerate language like the suggestions below.
- Instead of "Brothers and Sisters", use "Siblings" or "Family"
- Instead of "Guys and Gals", use "Guys, Gals, and Nonbinary Pals"
- Instead of "Ladies and Gents", use "Ladies, Gentlemen, Gentlefolk"
- Use fully inclusive words like "Everyone", "Folks", or even "People of the World!"
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4. Use trigger warnings or content notes - We are a community that has suffered a lot of trauma. As such, we require that threads that include disturbing content be prefaced with a trigger warning (TW) or a content note (CN). Threads that contain the following always require a trigger warning: hate speech and/or transphobia, self-harm, suicide, abuse of any kind, murder, rape and sexual assault, pregnancy, and menstruation. Content notes (CN) are useful when you aren't sure if your content should have a trigger warning, but want to give folks a heads up anyway. Content notes are useful for things like sex, surgery, negative self-talk ("I'm so ugly!", "I'm a horrible person!", "Everyone hates me!"), and other potentially uncomfortable situations.
.
.
5. Admins aren't scary - While we are often only recognized when we're involved in a "hot" thread, we're members just like you. If you're unsure if content is appropriate for the group, feel free to send one of us a message and we'll let you know. We also encourage members to gently educate each other on the guidelines of the group and use the Facebook "Report to Admin" feature if they see something inappropriate. Blocking admins is not allowed and is grounds for removal from the group. Calling us "nazis" is grounds for an immediate removal from the group. You can find a full list of admins here. The link may not work on mobile and may not work for those folks who are not members of the group already. If that is the case, you will have to go to the group, click "info", then "members", then "admins", and it should pull up a full list. Pro tip: That also works for other groups, if you need to find their admins.
.
.
6. No fundraising - While we have, in the past, allowed fundraising for transition-related expenses, we have decided that an across-the-board rule against fundraising is in the group's best interest. Not only is it not really the purpose of the group, transgender and gender non-conforming people are systemically marginalized and are often struggling financially. As such, we encourage folks to share their fundraisers elsewhere. We do, however, allow members to share their personal businesses, so etsy shops or other platforms that offer products are acceptable. We just ask that members share them in the group no more than once a week.
.
.
7. No add-me posts or PM requests - We encourage folks to make friends within the group. Participating on each other's threads will naturally lead to forming friendships. As such, we do not allow folks to make posts that are requests for friend-adds or private messages. There are plenty of other spaces for that kind of thing.
.
.
8. No topless, lingerie, swimsuit or suggestive photos, or images with excessive skin - While we understand that nipples are not inherently sexual, due to the wide variety of bodies and genders in the group and Facebook's lackluster enforcement of their own nudity policy, we do not allow *any* topless images of any kind within the group from anybody of any gender. This means that all shirtless images must be cropped at the armpits. We also do not allow images in lingerie or swimsuits, and images that show excessive skin, cleavage, or are in some way suggestive may be removed at the admins' discretion. This is due to the fact that this group contains minors (as young as 13), many of whom are in situations with less-than-accepting parents, and it would really suck if they lost access to the group because their parents happened to spot someone's scantily clad selfie in the group. There are many trans spaces that do not have these image guidelines, so we feel fair in asking that this space be visually Safe-For-Work.
.
.
9. No prosthetic photos - This relates to the above. Please no images of breastforms, packers, or other groin prosthetics.
.
.
10. No violent images - This includes articles about the latest transgender bashing, images that depict violence, and images of weapons or firearms. While we know that many of our members enjoy hunting or have served in some form of military, we ask that they leave those images depicting firearms or weapons outside the group. Videos depicting verbally abusive or violent behavior directed at others are also unallowed.
.
.
11. No hate speech - Except in the instances of self-identification, any use of slurs or hate speech will be removed. This includes but is not limited to: the t-word, the n-word, f*ggot, b*tch, and sh*male. Repeated use of slurs or hate speech may result in removal from the group. This also extends to the repeated bashing of groups of people. While we understand how frustrating folks can be, extensive bashing of cis folks at large, religious folks at large, etc, may result in removal from the group. This group is about support, and while we all understand the need to vent, we can do that in a way that doesn't bash people and make the space feel unsafe for others.
.
.
12. No call outs - Due to the size of our group, we do not allow call outs in this space. Any screenshots must have individuals' names, phone numbers, and/or other personal identifying information blurred out. We also do not allow call outs of other organizations, groups, or companies. While we're more than willing to help folks navigate a formal reporting process, trying to get the group to rally to petitions etc. is not what this space is for. This includes calling out the admins for removing content that goes against the rules.
.
.
13. No dosages or DIY medical transition - Due to the potential serious health risks, medical transition should be monitored by qualified health care professionals. Therefore, Do-It-Yourself medical transition advice is not allowed in this group. Any comments or threads that list dosage amounts or provide information on how to seek out such information will be deleted. This includes images of prescriptions, bottles, or medication itself that is suggestive of dosages. We encourage all members to be informed of the latest World Professional Association for Transgender Health (WPATH) Standards of Care (SOC) which can be found here.
.
.
14. No sharing outside the group - This is a closed group. Folks can see who is a member, but cannot see any posts or comments unless they are also a member. Sharing anything directly from the group is not advised, as only other group members will see it anyway. Sharing screencaps from the group is not allowed under any circumstances and will result in immediate removal from the group. The only exception to this rule is that some states/provinces/regions/countries require professionals to report suspected abuse or suicide threats. There may be such professionals in the group and any such action by the professional is for the member's protection. It should be noted that we expect professionals to know the legislation relevant to this in their area, to use their best judgement, and to come to the group in the spirit of personal support, rather than professional intervention, whenever possible.
.
.
15. No research, surveys, polls, or fishing for media content - All requests for research of any kind should be forwarded to an admin for review by the rest of the admin team. Since transgender individuals are frequently asked to participate in studies without being provided with knowledge of the researcher's credentials and supervision, a clear description of the study and its procedures, informed consent, information about the risks or benefits of participation, or assurance that data provided will remain confidential and anonymous, any attempt to enlist our members in research without prior admin approval will be deleted without notice. Only studies previously approved by an Institutional Review Board (either university-based or commercial), as required by US federal law when doing human research, (or research similarly governed, if outside the US) will be considered. This extends to surveys, polls, and fishing for media content such as articles or viral lists. Repeated attempts to engage our members in any of the above will result in removal from the group.
.
.
16. No live streaming - Due to the size of the group and Facebook's insufficient administrative tools around live streaming, we do not permit anyone to live stream to the group for reasons of community safety. We encourage those who wish to live stream to do so *outside* the group and then to share the video to the group after live streaming has ceased. Any live streams to the group will be removed on sight.
17. Codeword - The secret code for the group application is 'pineapple' 🍍.
